I want to briefly discuss two things today, the details of this outfit of course, and I also want to talk about somethings that have been weighing on my heart lately. But first I have to say this…the verbal and emotional attacks on women have GOT to stop.
Women, we are literally at war with each other. But some of us are literally at war within ourselves. And trust me when I say this, when a woman is at war within herself it shows, and baby it shows bad!
I have always had a computer in my household since a very young age. I remember when desktop computers started becoming more popular and common, I remember being one of the first amongst my elementary school classmates to have a computer at home. I was crafty with AOL instant messenger (aka AIM) unlike no other. When MySpace got hot, I knew how to twerk the hell out of some HTML and garnered a pretty large following compared to the average user. I latched on to Facebook and eventually YouTube pretty early on to.
Of course I never foresaw any of those websites becoming nearly as popular as they ended up, I just used them because I thought they were fun. Over the years I must admit as I finally began to grow into my looks I knew a thing or two about how to take some good photos, so selfies really aren’t new or revolutionary to me! lol
But anywho the point I want to make about social media is what it’s evolved into now. From makeup bashing, to the natural hair cat fights. It’s not enough to just ‘do you’ anymore. If you wear weaves and wigs, you’re a sellout. If you’re hair is natural and you color your hair, you’re not natural enough. I have seen some of the girls I know and love on Youtube literally go viral, all for being poked fun at for what they look like without makeup.
What was once, for the most part, a way for people to just connect and keep in touch with friends has now become an opinion dump for people to say whatever they want to whomever they want with seemingly little to no remorse or consequence. Today it’s so easy to completely humiliate or embarrass someone and having them go viral.
And it’s almost always about women!!! Maybe I over analyze because I am a woman, and not to take away from the media’s pathetic portrayal of my brothers in this country, but it seems like the scrutiny on women happens WAY more frequently than it does for men, by far.
Just look at instagram! How likely are you to come across a meme that says something like “b*tches be like”, “hoes be like”, gold diggers this and gold diggers that. I mean what on Earth?! Don’t even get me started on the whole Ray and Janay Rice controversy, because apparently according to some folks, if a man beats his wife and she does not leave the marriage it is SHE who deserves it.
I remember when Carolina Berg Erikson posted an image of her post pregnancy body within a week of giving birth on instagram and got completely read for filth being called every single name in the book for looking damn good not just considering the fact that she just had a baby, but for looking good period. What gender do you think most of the comments were coming from?! I’ll let you take a guess…
I saw this quote courtesy of @hippie_heathen on instagram: “Society loves an insecure woman. You can be pretty but don’t you dare recognize it. You can be smart but you BETTER minimize and downplay it.” I can identify with this because it’s SO true. How many times have you seen a photo of a woman online wearing a sexy outfit and in the comments section she gets called all kinds of crazy names, whore, skank, slut, etc. Just for being confident and looking good? I have experienced that myself several times which partially prompted me to write this.
Listen, we KNOW we all have opinions, but we all aren’t obligated to listen, or care for that matter!
Sometimes jealousy is rooted in accountability. Like “I can’t do it, and I can’t have it, so help me God if someone else does”…type of mentality. Also known as ‘crabs in a barrel’. I am addressing this issue in the best way I know how without trying to generalize a group of people because I do have hope in us. But my message is for us as women. The emotional and verbal attacks that I see (in my experience) are mainly amongst each other. And I believe the reason why it’s so easy to clown on a woman on social media, is because they are easy targets and it’s a formula proven to work. Alls you gotta do is create a meme or a joke with a before and after picture of a girl with and without makeup and just sit back and watch everyone chimes in. Male and female.
We need to stop tearing each other down, seriously. If WE don’t have each others backs, THEY most certainly won’t!
I have a voice and I choose to use mine wisely. So I said all of that to say…LOVE yourself. If you do, you won’t have the time or the energy to spend spewing hatefulness onto someone else. Trust me, I’ve tried it. Hating is hard work. If I’m going to be working hard at something transactions MUST be involved. I would highly advise you not to be a hater if you’re not at all being paid for it. No ma’am.
Have a bowl of ice cream, take a selfie and be happy girl! The right clothes, I can assure you, can also help with that 😛
Anywho back to your regularly scheduled programming! Here’s today’s look
crop top ShopMarkkit
Pencil Skirt | F21
Gold Clutch | ShopMarkkit
Chandelier Necklace | Bell of California
Stiletto Heels | F21
I know you came for the outfit, but I couldn’t leave you without first sharing a little of what’s been on my mind the past few months ALSO, this makeup look shown in the photos is the same look from my Get Ready With Me Ankara makeup tutorial. Check it out if you want to see how I pulled off this stunning green smokey look!
I hope this is the start of a great week for all of you!